Angry Little Boys
I remember being a young boy and being mischievous and a trouble maker. I received many spankings and loud talking too by my parents. Painful, you bet. Stressful, absolutely. Funny how I don't remember my Sisters receiving nearly the same physical attitude adjustments as I did. I thought it was unfair. Of course I was stupid and did not know better. I did not know that young boys respond too and learn discipline through physical domination.
I can hear alarm bells going off right now. But it is true. All the mothers that read this are shouting that little John is just misunderstood and if they could just find the words or the bible phrase it will turn his life around. Meanwhile Dad is not allowed to lay a hand on John. While it is true some boys will learn reason and follow rules as explained to them the first time. These fine young boys are held up as the model. However, there is a breed of young boy that will torment the single mom or the passive parents.
The human make up of a young boy is usually a combination of uncontrollable exuberance, defiance towards authority and risk taking with reckless abandon. When properly shaped by his Mother and Father he will grow up into a fantastic human being.
I went into a fast food restaurant years ago with my two sons who are grown now. Inside there were only a few people. I was the only grown man in the place. The crew running the establishment were of course teenagers with the lead person being a young lady. Sitting at a table closest to the food counter were four teenage boys around fifteen or sixteen years old. Punks. Shooting spite wads at the crew behind the counter, harassing the young girls cleaning the tables. In their own small way making a mundane eating experience miserable. The other patrons in the place looked uncomfortable but kept eating. Not bothered quit enough to leave. Or maybe making a half ass stand. "I don't care if this is only Del Taco, you little bastards aren't going ruin my 99 cent meal." The young lady left in charge came out and talked to the boys in her best grown up voice and was rewarded with sneers and snickers. Of course, my sons are watching this unfold and were also watching me.
These things occurred when I was growing up in the seventies. Boys will be boys as the saying goes. What usually happened then was a man or a strong woman would enter the place and see what was going on and begin to clean house. A total stranger! taking a stand. Typically a man would put the arm on the little shits and inflict pain to demonstrate he meant business and speak directly to the issue - such as " Does your mother know your down here causing problems? What's your name son? I think it is time for you to leave." And that would be that. The boys knew that if there moms and dads found out there would be hell to pay.
Over the years a sad and destructive force has entered into the realm of enforcing community standards. Lawyers!
I picked up our food at the counter and looked at the frustrated young lady behind it. She smiled, pretending all was well. I put the food down next to my sons and walked over to the punks. I reached in my pocket a pulled out my cell phone. I locked eyes with the head prankster who was smiling at me like I was his best friend. "How you guys doing?" I said. Then I squatted down next to them and slide into the seat, crowding them. This completely surprised them. I looked at them all. The one was openly laughing and spoke loudly "What are you fucking gay?" I gave him my best Dirty Harry face. " It's time for you guys to leave." Two of them were no longer laughing. "Take your shit and leave now."
"You can't touch me and you can't make us leave." The punk was right. I brought my phone into view and dialed 911. I showed it to all the little bastards sitting around me and watched them squirm. Smiley was debating whether to call my bluff or not. "What do we want to do? If I make this call you boys will be staying until cops get here and then they are going to talk to your parents."
"My parents don't care, they'll sue your ass" I pushed the send button and put the phone next to my ear. Lemme out, come on Mister. smiley pleaded. I let them go and as predicted the flipped me the finger and walked away, looking over their shoulder to make sure I would not come after them.
I have witnessed this behavior a lot over the years as a father. I have also witnessed painful negotiations from parents with their children to be good. I plead guilty to the latter. The verbal abuse I absorbed from that little asshole would have been unconscionable in my day. You sue some body because they did you wrong. Not because they stopped you from doing wrong. There is no doubt these boy knew they were doing wrong and had no respect for me. Only the threat of the police would do. I'm certain they knew they would not get in serious trouble, but getting tied up with the cops would have ruined their evening. If I would have laid a strong hand on that boy and made him fear me. Or threatened him in any way I could have potentially lost everything I owned in a law suit. At the very least my life would have been made a living hell for a fair period of time. What was demonstrated that day was the inmates are running the asylum. Had they believed that pain and punishment were truly imminent they would never have insulted me and been respectful when I approached them. Instead my entire lively hood was threatened by some punk 16 year old. I'm not a moralist. It was just annoying to the point where I had to do something.
Imagine if every young man feared and respected honorable men or adults? Knowing that if they stepped out of line they would quickly be put back in it. What a concept. Next time you hear about some guy going to jail or prison because some child lied about a crime he committed.